Yes, this post IS NARCISSISM.

What the frick is up with food tasting so fricking good? and wine? why does that taste good, too? Don't get me started on Brie... I mean, if God wanted us not to be gluttons, why so yummy? and, if I just need more self control, why didn't He give it to me? Oh, my goodness, i'm such a sinner. i can hardly stand it. I hate that i love food. and wine. i wish i had the self-control to be aneorexic. or an ascetic. or african. chubby is beautiful in africa...

What might have been...

I'll be the first to admit that I am pretty careless.

When I was six years old, I had this piece of acetate fabric. I think that's what it was called. Anyway, I loved it. It was cream and had a damask pattern on it. I thought it was the prettiest, most luxorious thing I might ever own. I used to play with it in my basement. It was my wedding veil, mostly. sometimes a tablecloth.

It was a tablecloth the day I decided to paint my nails. I got fingernail polish on it. Well, I was a resourceful six year old, so I got the fingernail polish remover and blotted - only the fingernail polish remover ate a giant hole right in the middle of the beautiful tapestry... and it smelled pretty bad.

I share that story tonight because it came to mind when...

I made Salem a dress. cutest little jumper ever. Against my better judgement, I just had to make the yoke (the cute little rounded collar thing) out of acetate - a cheap little remnant that Salem picked out. (i'm sure you see where this is going.) It was beautiful. almost done. just need a few buttons on the back, and it's complete. but, oh, let me be thorough. i'll iron it.

acetate lesson learned: irons on the highest setting + acetate = a shriveled, burnt, holey mess. do you think I could put a flower there, or something? seriously, when will i learn?

elijahism - the first of this type of post that i'm sure will be plentiful.

So, Salem wore the dress today. the dress that i marathon sewed (um, with more than a little help from jessica - thanks!) last week. so pretty. I was admiring her in it, and she said, "You made this dress at Miss Jessica's." I said, "yep, i sure did. it was just a big sheet of fabric until I turned it into this dress." Elijah said, "What?!?! How did you do that?! Do you have a real wand or somephing?"

reconstructed garden history

Sooooo - last night, we got Elijah this $1.99 snake at the BXtra to replace the one that i took from him to be used as moses' staff / snake in training in the pews, then lost. (sorry, lij.) Anyway, this morning, I gave my children their wholesome and balanced breakfast - Clif bars - and went into the other room to feed babykins. As I was finishing up feeding Aaron, from around the corner I heard Elijah shouting, "NO, snake! DO NOT TEMPT HER TO EAT THAT GRANOLA BAR!!!" Salem concluded the interaction by declaring, "Snake, I will kill you." (she and elijah then went on to eat their granola bars, then play with her doll house by flashlight)

my hubby's famous

so, here's jason working this machine that freezes people who've had heart attacks. supposed to induce hypotherma of sorts - (right, hun?) - to slow down body processes to prevent brain damage, etc. he got to be a part of the first case of ever using it at the hospital he works at.

NEW TECHNOLOGY HELPS CARDIAC PATIENT
http://www.whmc.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123131463

Breaking down geographical and socioeconomic barriers

who knew that my favorite (well second favorite to ambrosia... and don't TELL ME you haven't heard of ambrosia.) childhood dessert was only ever discovered, loved, and cherished by the lower middle class of the northeast United States? It reminds me of those old Reeses Peanut Butter Cup commercials where all those people from historic times ALMOST discover the heavenly combination of chocolate and peanut butter. It's a dessert. It's an appetizer. Its... pretzel j-ello. Well, today this Pittsburgh girl broadened the horizons of world-traveling, Sweedish-marrying, Master's Degree-having, Minnesotan Jessica. And she loved it! For the rest of you skeptics, c'mon over for a taste. Or make your own. here's the recipe:

INGREDIENTS

crust:

• 2 cups crushed pretzels
• 3/4 cup butter, melted
• 3 tablespoons white sugar

filling:

• 1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese, softened
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1 (8 ounce) container frozen whipped topping, thawed

topping:

• 2 (3 ounce) packages strawberry flavored gelatin
• 2 cups boiling water
• 2 (10 ounce) packages frozen strawberries

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C).
2. Stir together crushed pretzels, melted butter and 3 tablespoons sugar; mix well and press mixture into the bottom of a 9x13 inch baking dish.
3. Bake 8 to 10 minutes, until set. Set aside to cool.
4. In a large mixing bowl cream together cream cheese and 1 cup sugar. Fold in whipped topping. Spread mixture onto cooled crust.
5. Dissolve gelatin in boiling water. Stir in still frozen strawberries and allow to set briefly. When mixture is about the consistency of egg whites, pour and spread over cream cheese layer. Refrigerate until set.

not narcissism

Okay, so - I'm doing it. I was heartily convinced by ladies that I trust and love dearly that this is NOT narcissistic. Yay. because I think I'm going to like it. And without a classroom of students who "have" to listen to me spout off my (ahem) wisdom for hours on end, this may be a nice little substitute.